I Have No Routine for My Baby

Brycen is almost 5 months old now, and we are still co-sleeping. He wakes up several times each night and drinks formula from a bottle. He'll drink and pass out again. Due to my husband's work schedule, he doesn't come home until around midnight. From there, he spends time with our son while we prep for bed. I'll sometimes shower at this point knowing he's home to watch the baby.

Since I network with other mom's of 5 month olds, I know that we have no schedule or routine --and it's not normal to be like us. I hear that other moms know when they're feeding their babies. They know when and how long each nap is. Their bedtimes are set at times ranging from 7-9pm. Many moms have babies that don't wake up to eat at night. They sleep 6-8 hours without a problem.

In our house, we have no clue when Brycen eats. When he cries, we give him a bottle. When he's tired, we let him fall asleep. When he is no longer tired, he wakes up. Prior to now, we were told to do everything "on demand" based on his needs. Now, he's getting to an age where he may be expecting certain things regardless of if he really wants them. So, I started a web form that my husband and I have bookmarked on our phones. We always have our phones on us, so this makes it easy to log activity. I have check boxes for starting naps, finishing naps, drinking formula, eating baby food, changing diapers (and what kind of diaper), and also when he gets bathed. All we do is check of a box on whatever activity we're logging and click "submit". I get a spreadsheet report that shows exactly what was done and when. The system isn't perfect. If we forget to log something, it looks strange. If I'm driving and our son falls asleep, I'm not about to pull over to log it on my phone.

We're looking at the previous day's logs and trying to work something into a routine. I'd love to get our son sleeping earlier, but that doesn't help us in the morning since our son will be waking up earlier while we're still going to bed late.

We would also like to transition our son into his crib sometime soon. He's getting to an age where he can wake up and look around for us. I want him to feel secure in his crib while looking up at his nursery walls.

Obviously, parenting is different for everyone. This is a big, stressful topic for me because I really had no clue that other moms were keeping up routines and schedules. I don't want to fall behind with parenting skills and lessons. Brycen needs to learn when he should expect food and sleep to feel more secure, and we are working hard at giving him that stability.