There's currently a situation in my life which is completely absorbing my mind. (Hint: it's not the pregnancy.) This problem is wrapped around someone hugely important to me. There are so many things I want to say to this person. I want to break down into tears and have an hours-long talk with him/her. Because I'm pregnant, I haven't made a single attempt to say or do anything. The thought of crying so hard I can't breathe just doesn't sound healthy with this baby inside me.
Instead of talking to this person about my "problem", I'm just cutting him/her off. Things that we normally used to share are no longer even available to him/her. I have a feeling s/he doesn't even realize why things are different. I'm bothered by the fact that this person is constantly on my mind because I don't think he/she even thinks something is wrong with regards to our recent communications.
All I can say is that this person is hurting me. I convert my pain into anger, and it's only making the situation worse. I really feel like I'm on the verge of conflict, but I'm doing my best to keep my stress levels low.
2 comments:
Oh boy, *hug*. Pregnancy does make us more emotional - kinda like planning our wedding :). I don't think you need to pretend nothing's wrong, but you can be honest about your feelings. You can say what you want to say but in a non-accusatory way, like "I know you don't mean to hurt me, but I was hurt when you [...] and that's because you mean a lot to me, because if you didn't I wouldn't care so much about what you do, and I want to be able to celebrate this time of my life with you." I don't know, something like that. I pray that God will give you wisdom. Hang in there, this too shall pass!!
((HUGS)) I hope things get better with this person soon. I know you were not looking for advice but you could write a letter. It is what I do when I need to say something really important but am worried about forgetting things or getting the right point across. If nothing else it may help ease your mind a little and take a little stress off of you.
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